The year after my mother died, I was going through a lot of her things. I was helping my dad pack some stuff to give away of my mom's as it was so very hard for my dad to do. I came across a box of papers, they were my mom's figuring, as she called it. My mother loved to make lists. That was one of her favorite pass times. She made lists of everything from all her weekly grocery lists to illnesses she had in her life, to clothes she made for us kids and what flowers she planted in the back yard. She also loved to right down family trees and when people were born and died and many times what they died of. Among her pages of lists on notebook paper was stories of faith, blessings she had and trials she experienced. Someone may have looked at these papers as a bunch of messy scribbling of thoughts quickly put down on paper of all sizes and some torn and written over, misspelled words and hurried script but to me they were a treasure.
That box full of papers was a box full of gold to me. They were the thoughts, stories and events that formed my childhood and my beloved faith in a great God who cared about the big and small things of my life.
Just yesterday evening I pulled this stack of papers out and began to read through them. I found several sheets of paper divided in half. On one side mom had written "Joys" and on the other she had written "Trials". My mother had a lot of hard things that happened to her in childhood and my folds struggled with very little money in the early years of their marriage. When the list started out it was "even steven" with the joys and trials but as the list went on the joys over took the trials and she had several pages of just joys. That was my mom, she was a hopeful and thankful person. That was the work of the Holy Spirit in her life. That is what she imparted to me and I never forgot.
When I became down at times about things or even to the point of despair I would remember her example and I would look up and think about the Lord and all He has done for me and hope would begin to fill my heart. I would begin to think of what the Lord would want me to do as my heart yielded to the truth of His Word, what He said in the Bible. I would find strength to go on in whatever situation I was in. Hope in the LORD would fill my mind and my heart. In closing I will include some of my mother's list of joys and trials.
1. Trial: Mother and Father were unhappy in their marriage. Joy: They were faithful to each other and loved one another.
2. Trial: Very poor as far as money goes. Joy: We owned our own home, plenty to eat, always warm and enough to wear.
3. Trial: Father not born again. Joy: Mother a wonderful Christian.
4. Trial: Father never told us he loved us or made any display of affection. Joy: Mother was very loving. Father supported us and in lots of ways he loved us and Mother.
5. Trial: Lots of sickness in the home. Joy: God always seen us through every trial.
6. Trial: Was very large in my teens. Joy: God helped me to lose 100 lbs.
7. Trial: Didn’t get to finish high school. Joy: Got to go to Bible school.
8. Trial: During our first year of marriage we had quite a low income. Joy: All our needs were met and a lot of our desires.
9. Trial: We always had to plan carefully for the things we got. Joy: Made us to appreciate what we got.
10. Trial: We lost a baby boy, Phillip, at 2 days of age. Joy: We have a great treasure in heaven.
11. Trial: Living in a small trailer house for 5 years. Joy: We learned patience & forgiveness & love & to depend on God with all our hearts.
